It’s your birthday? Wait, let me unfriend you.

It’s no secret I have a few bones to pick with social media, and technology in general despite being born and brought up by computer science.My qualms about social media, technology, and all the various gadgets that are the evil spawn of computer science were well reinforced by my friend’s blog post on appreciation today. Look at what she has to say, it’s really cool! And don’t forget to Like Pitbull WorldWide on Facebook.

When did a chip become something other than that you dip and enjoy? When did a cookie become something non- ahoy ? And when did a tablet become something that you glare at and develop a characteristic squint, rather than something white and bitter that comes in a blue wrapping that you wash down with water to control a fever ?

It’s not all too bad though. Although I know that if it came to it, I CAN find my way from point A to point B, a part of me is thankful for that sexy lady voice that says “In one hundred feet, your destination will be on the right”. And just yesterday Retail Me Not saved me 20% at Kohls. So .. okay. It’s how the cookie crumbles, right ? Not what it stores in your browser ?

Speaking of privacy, do you ever have this feeling that you have WAY too many Facebook friends ? I do. And what’s more unfortunate is most of them are  acquaintances. Who need not know what is happening with me. Yeah I know that FB has had an “Acquaintances” list built in for a while now complete with the one privacy option that allows you to Show This to Friends Except Acquaintances. Genius. But you have to designate Random Person X as Acquaintance, and you need to have the presence of mind to do this when you accept their friend request (because face it, you are never going to go back and do it later). And THEN, FB will go ahead and tweak their settings in a small, inconspicuous manner so as to reveal ALL your deepest darkest secrets on your Timeline to said acquaintance. So, why are you airing your dirty laundry on your Timeline, you ask. I don’t. But there are enough stupid people out there who do.

Anyway, I keep straying from my point which is this – I realize that I have someone totally unnecessary on my list only when I see their birthday alert. And my brain says to me – Damn girl, why has this person got ANY insight into your life at all ? And my urge is to unfriend them. But come on, it’s their birthday! There is a good chance that they’ve already blocked all my updates anyway because MOST of them are about dogs that need rescuing, or that are up for adoption, or my own dog because he is bloody gorgeous. But what if they haven’t ? Then one day after they turned ‘old’ they won’t be seeing all these awesome updates of my oh so exciting life and realize that I unfriended them. AND they’re ‘old’. Mess, yes ?

So i’ll make a mental note to do it another day. And then like all the other notes that are mental and not on my smart phone, or my calendar this one too finds it’s way into a black hole of forgetfulness and general stupidity that comes from owning a smart phone.What makes this whole birthday thing worse is that I can’t really post a Facebook Status Update about it, even on a day when I do not see an alert, because it’s SOMEONE’s birthday that day. When you combine the probability of having atleast one birthday from among 494 people on a given day , with Murphy’s Laws, you will have pissed atleast ONE person off.

So, the list grows from 494 upwards and the trauma is endless. The social pressure builds. Do I want to break the cycle ?Would you ?

Would you unfriend someone ON THEIR BIRTHDAY ?

ADOPTABLE MIDNIGHT, horrified at the thought of unfriending someone on their birthday!

ADOPTABLE MIDNIGHT, horrified at the thought of unfriending someone on their birthday! Contact cauzicanfl@gmail.com for more information.

You make me wanna throw up, lol jk.

Today’s Daily Prompt asks this:

If you could permanently ban a word from general usage, which one would it be? Why?

I say, “Lol”. And no, not jk. This new addition to our daily oxford makes the hair on the back of my neck stand up. I hate it. I thought this hatered used to be inexplicable, but it’s not! And here is why – A lot of lol users use it to get away with writing something mean. Here is an example – Someone posts a picture and say they’re donning a little holiday weight. Lol user comes along and posts their comment – “Stopped hitting  the gym I see Lol”.. Hmm… lol is not a buzzword to make a passive aggressive remark, all happy again.

Of course this is not always the case. There are the more benign uses of lol. Many of my friends use it, and I love them anyway, because their lols are harmless. They are probably actually Laughing Out Loud at something that should be laughed out loud at! Plus the holiday weight situation will be dealt with in a straight up manner. Like it should be. Maybe with a glass of wine, lol! (Sometimes, I disgust myself)

And do not get me started on the extended cousins of lol – Lmao, rotflol, lol jk (absolute worst I can hear the milk curdling use of lol).

Just a smiley face will do. Press the shift and the ‘;’ (semicolon) key simultaneously. Then press the Shift and the 0 (zero) key simultaneously and voila! No more lol needed.